David Tennant's Obscure TV Appearances: 1989's 'Play On One: Biting The Hands'

Sep 23, 2023

I’m excited to share my latest find…I’ve finally obtained access to David’s third earliest TV performance! His first two performances were in 1988: his anti-smoking ad, and in Dramarama: The Secret Of Croftmore. And in 1989 he did a Play On One called Biting The Hands. And I’ve FINALLY got it!

Biting The Hands has been one of the more elusive pieces of work David did in his early years. First of all, it wasn’t a sitcom or an ad but a one-off play, and it was broadcast in the late 1980s, limiting its exposure to those who might be recording on beta or VHS. It was part of the second series of the prime-time contemporary single TV play series, The Play On One (which was itself a re-tooling of an older series called The Play For Today.) Biting The Hands was directed by Carol Wilks and produced by Norman McCandlish. It was 75 mins in length, and was broadcast at 9:30 pm on 11 Apr 1989.

Here is the play’s synopsis: “Linda and Gail are Hell’s Belles - an alternative comedy double act. When success begins to beckon, they must decide whether to change their act or keep doing what they believe in. Are their principles justified, or are they just ‘biting the hand that feeds them?”

The writer of Biting The Hands, Rona Munro, was born in Aberdeen in 1959 and is an award-winning Scottish playwright. She started writing professionally in 1981 and has written for film, television, stage and radio. Biting The Hands was Munro’s first play for BBC-TV. Given today’s excitement about the Doctor Who 60th Anniversary trailer, it might interest Whovians to know Munro wrote the classic DW story Survival as well as the New Who story The Eaters of Light, making her the first (and only) writer to do both Classic and New Who.

But Munro has yet ANOTHER connection with our dear DT! For their production of Scotland Matters in 1992, the 7:84 Scottish People’s Theatre asked established Scottish writers to consider aspects of life in Scotland and write playlets about them. Munro was one of these writers! She wrote a playlet called 'The Fence’ for Scotland Matters which concerned the interrogation of a Gulf War peace protester. In a turn around of questioning technique, we are told the story through the security police and not via the protester. David played the protester, Keith.

But back to Biting The Hands - which was produced three years before Scotland Matters and filmed when David was still in drama school. Let’s take a look at what the play was about, and go more in depth about its stars: Judith Sweeney (Linda) and Louise Beattie (Gail).

Judith Sweeney (Linda McKay) attended David’s alma mater - the RSAMD, now the Royal Conservatoire - and graduated in 1977. She played the role of Sally Shaw on the Scottish soap opera Take The High Road. Louise Beattie (Gail Graham) later went on to star in Emmerdale.

Here are a few more articles on “Biting The Hands” from the time of its broadcast:

Beattie’s older sister Maureen has ALSO starred with DT many times! Among these are For One Night Only (an evening of theatrical prose, poetry, and gossip at the Swan Theatre for the 1998 RSC Fringe Festival) and a 2001 staged reading of Medea at the Cottesloe (now the Dorfman) Theatre. More recently, Maureen has played David’s mother in Deadwater Fell, and Kelly MacDonald’s mother in The Decoy Bride!

Now we’ve been introduced to the stars of the play, and we know what it’s about, let’s get to David’s part! His part begins about 47 minutes into the play, and it’s a role which makes up a total of about 20 whole seconds. He plays one of three squaddies (low-ranking military) and is in a group of soldiers who travel on the train the main characters Linda and Gail board in Edinburgh to go to London - but he’s not seen in this particular scene. After the ladies board the return train back home to Edinburgh, by coincidence these same squaddies happen to be traveling on their train. David’s character is the only one of the squaddies to speak, and his words entail wolf-whistles at the two women and calling them “Pet”! Here are some screenshots:

In a later scene, Linda and Gail happen to bump into another friend on the train, and the three open a bottle of liquor and sing and drink. David’s character sings and drinks with them. Here are a few screenshots of that short scene:

You may notice in the first set of screenshots David is clean shaven, and in the second, he sports a mustache. These scenes all supposedly occur on the same train from London to Edinburgh so it seems there’s a continuity error here. Perhaps these scenes were shot at different times?

These short scenes are the only times David appears in the play. He’s given credit in the end titles. Of significance, though, is he is NOT credited as the “Third Squaddie” (a designation I’ve seen all over the Internet for close to a decade). He’s just the third squaddie listed.

The BFI (British Film Institute) holds a VHS video recording of Biting The Hands. The copy is in “pending” status, which means it’s unlikely the copy can be viewed. It "requires inspection to determine preservation or access status" - which means, of course, they haven't looked at it to see if it's worth saving, or if it's even able to be saved. It might not, since videocassettes are notorious for degrading. The video has been in this holding pattern at least since 2017, and will probably continue to be in this holding pattern unless someone specifically asks to view it - in which case, the Institute might be "encouraged" to transfer it to DVD if nothing else.

Before I close this post on Biting The Hands, two more little benefits: here are its opening sequence, and its title frame!